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so that night, we had a very intense make out session. im sorry to those of you that dont want to read the details, you can just skip this part. but its important in order for you to know just how badly i loved him to the point where i would do anything he asked of me without a second thought.

i was sitting on his lap and he started pushing my shirt all the way up to my bra. i stopped kissing at him and stared right into his eyes. What was he thinking? did he really think i was that kind of girl? he had his hands under my shirt while it was pulled up and he started moving his fingers right below my bra strap and he kissed me on my neck. another long, beautifully passionate kiss on my neck and i was hooked. he looked at me and i nodded.

with that, he took my shirt off and began kissing me again. however this time, it was rough. it was like he had wanted me for so long that he couldnt believe it and just showed me how badly he wanted it. he laid me on the couch and he came on top of me. i felt the electricity go up and down my spine. i love him so much, i thought. and, like he said, we were going to get married.

he slipped my bra strap down my shoulder and started planting kisses right above my breasts but he never actually took my bra off or anything. he then placed his hand on top of my bra and felt my breast while he was kissing my neck. i dont know what it was, but something about him turned me on so much. i think it was just everything. he was perfect.

he sat up and pulled his shirt off and got back on top of me. his body was to die for. he had the six pack that people spend years trying to achieve and his whole body was just perfectly toned. the feeling of his bare chest on mine was a feeling that i dont think i will ever experience again. it was love. i know it was. not just love for his body, but love for the man that i was going to spend the rest of my life with.

after we made out for an hour or so, we sat up and just stared at each other.

"Noora, what would you love for me to do to you?" he asked in a very naughty way.

i was still very innocent and, remember, he was the first guy i had ever even given the time of day to. "i love it when you kiss my neck" i put my head down because that was so embarrassing to say! and without me even realizing, he leaned in and placed his lips on the side of my neck and left me in a daze for about ten minutes.

"Noora, you didnt ask me what i want" this time his voice sounded even naughtier. i expected him to say something like: i want you to kiss me because thats all we've basically done. but he didnt.

"what do you want 7abeeby?" i was so in love, at that moment, at that time, nothing in the world mattered as much as him.

he looked down at his pants and pointed down there "abee blowjob"

"im scared" i didnt know what to tell him. i wanted to make him happy. but, a blowjob? thats too much.

"no baby dont be scared, i'll guide you through it. Noora wain your room?" i pointed at the door of my bedroom and he picked me up and took me in there. he laid me down on the bed and jumped on top of me and started kissing me passionately all over my upper body, but he focused on the neck. he knew it turned me on.

then, he sat up and slipped his pants off. "ok?" he gave me a naughty look and sat down on the bed. "ta3alai sit next to me" and i did as i was told. "Noora, i want you to be my first everything. you were already my first love, i want you to be my first everything else" i nodded. "i want a favor" i nodded again. "itrideenee?" i shook my head, of course not. my baby wanted something, and i would give him whatever he wanted. he took my hand and placed it on top of his boxers.

i freaked out and moved my hand right away, only for him to reach for it and place it under his boxers this time. i could feel him. he was hard. not only could i feel it, but it showed. i liked the idea that i turned him on. it gave me confidence. he guided my hand up and down his penis slowly and when he tried to go faster, i moved my hand away.

"it wasnt that bad was it?" and he gave me a shy kind of sad look. i shook my head just because i wanted him to be happy. it wasnt that bad, it just wasnt something i wanted to do. you guys, take my advice, NEVER do what others want to do if youre not up for it. you WILL regret it.

"Noora, please?" and he pointed down there, so i gave him my hand back. "La2, abee your mouth" and he gave me a naughty look. i didnt know what to do. the most i knew about blowjobs was that the penis goes into the mouth. where do i sit? what do i do? la2 la2 this was too much. no way was i going to do this.

"Barrak...." i couldnt talk. as much as i hate to admit it, i was so turned on by him that night that i could barely talk.

"please?" i nodded. i was going to do whatever made him happy.

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im sorry you guys, i know you think im some kind of whore now, but it was out of my power. i couldnt help it. i was stupid and i regret it all. i fell for him hard and i couldnt say no to him. i was wrong and, please, if you have any mean or rude comments, save them because i already feel shitty enough about what happened.